i had been walking with my pockets full of stones for as long as i can remember. the well was overdrawn and dry. the path had been blanketed with leaves and needles.

under and endless amount of monikers and hypotheticals, you've woven yourself into the fabric of my being. slowly unraveling my defenses to my core.

i had been praying that you've found your star.

i took a quick gasp of air, only to be left in the dark.



on the coffee table in a dimly-lit living room, i spread out a map to the best of my ability. running my fingers over each of the creases, feeling every possible wrinkle under my fingertips. i let out a low sigh and perch my chin upon my hands with my elbows stabbing at my knees.

my eyes dart back and forth, my mind constructing a journey built upon the theoretical and hypotheticals.

my lungs are flooded with what was once lament and it spills from out of my throat onto the floor below.

i found myself yelling "self worth is not found in someone else" at the top of my lungs.

i've fought my battles, but i never really won.



my eyes dart back and forth from the brick buildings bathed in neon fluorescence and the luminous LCD screen as i attempt to pinpoint my destination. as i slowly come to a stop, a familiar figure stands on the sidewalk with her clutch in tow and a pair of inviting eyes with sight lines triangulating towards my position.

"hey," i meekly regurgitate the words as i am simultaneously nervous, yet captivated.

"bonjour, mon ami," she reciprocates while grabbing the door handle. she falls into the passenger seat and i can feel her surrounding warm air wash over me.

her scent reminds me of past passions.

her demeanor reminds me of everlasting endearment.

her beauty reminds me of devastating destruction.

"how was work?" i'm desperately trying to kick-start a conversation to further ourselves away from silence.

"i made some extra cash, and i wanted to spend it with you. let's get something to drink," she says with an air of positivity and cordiality.

she consults her phone for our eventual destination while i steal glances out of my periphery. i see her face alight from the brightness emanating from her hands as the rays disperse across her soft face. the contours and curves sculpt a perfect portrait that i long to carress with the back of my hand.

i refrain from contact and inhale deeply.

she reaches out and lays her hand on my forearm, i relax as i feel her hand melt into me.

without lifting her eyes, she whispers, "this will be all over soon."

it is within that moment that i've discovered catharsis and comfort in her presence.



an elegantly-placed butterfly kiss

seeking, searching, comatose atop this bed

i was busy spewing words without reason

but she was content in making waves instead



the evening fluorescence

filtered out by the blinds

complacency drips from her touch

revealing uncertainty in her eyes